Friday, September 22, 2017

Working with Difficult People and Using the Laughter Strategy

by DrJudy on

Working with difficult people who make fun of you can be very distressing and hurtful. In the previous dealing with difficult people post, this was the question again that Andrew needed assistance with in dealing with difficult people who are supposedly his friends…

THE QUESTION AGAIN FROM ANDREW TO REMIND YOU

“I’m quite sensitive and have friends who pick on me sometimes. I feel they do so because I usually don’t answer back. I have one friend who constantly makes reference to my receding hairline, and when he does so I turn bright red and go quiet. How do I handle this person without discussing the subject? (which I am a little sensitive on!)”.

ONE IDEA ON COPING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE

There are many suggestions that can be made to help Andrew cope and deal with difficult people such as this. But let’s start with one idea to change the situation dramatically. It will mean discussing the subject but it can be a very powerful strategy in dealing with people.

USING LAUGHTER AS A POWERFUL STRATEGY

Here is what you can do Andrew. Surf the internet and look for a story on “balding men being more attractive to women”. You will surely find a story along those lines. As there is no doubt that certain women find men who have receding hairlines or are bald as more attractive than those will a full head of hair.

USING THE STORY TO DIFFUSE DIFFICULT PEOPLE

Once you find such a story print it out. Then aim to make light of this person’s comments next time they make a comment about your receding hairline. It is important that you use humor and laughter and not come across as sensitive to his comments. You’ll probably need to practice what and how you say it when they next make the comment next time about your lack of hair.

YOU NEED TO CONSIDER HOW TO LOSE YOUR HAIR

So next time this difficult person makes disparaging remarks about your receding hairline. Stop them and say something like this… “You know Joe, you might not be aware but there’s a lot of research that suggests that many women are attracted to men with receding hairlines or who are bald. I’ve got a great study here that you should read. It might be time for you to realize that my lack of hair is actually a real magnet for women”.

MOVE ON IN HANDLING DIFFICULT PEOPLE

Hand him the article and walk away, saying “read this” as you go. Don’t wait for a response, just leave him to read the article. Then every time he mentions your hair again remind him again what a magnet you and other men can be with receding or no hair for women.

TAKING THE WIND OUT OF THE SAILS IN DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE

To ensure that this strategy works you must use humor and make light of the situation. When you don’t react and make light of the very thing that this person previously used to upset you, you take the wind out of their sails. You have actually taken a supposedly negative characteristic and changed it to a very, very positive characteristic for you. So give it a go Andrew, you’ll be surprised how effective using humor can be for you.

DEALING WITH PEOPLE PACKAGES FOR YOU

We’ll consider another strategy for Andrew in dealing with this upsetting, frustrating and annoying difficult person in the next blog post. But for now, if you are dealing with difficult people then you could use our DEALING WITH PEOPLE PACKAGES. You’ll become a master at Dealing with Difficult People.

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