Dealing with difficult people and communicating with difficult people can feel like a formidable, arduous and onerous process. But dealing with difficult people does mean that you have to attempt to communicate with them. In previous difficult people blog posts, we discussed several aspects of human communication.
DEALING WITH PEOPLE AND THE WHOLE COMMUNICATION PICTURE
These communication aspects include not just the words people say but the tone of their voice and their body language and other non-verbal communication. You need to listen with your ears to their verbal communication and listen with your eyes to their non-verbal communication.
PUTTING IT TOGETHER IN THE WHOLE PICTURE
When you pay attention to the verbal and non-verbal communication you’ll be way ahead of most people who barely take notice of what people are saying. Few people put it together for the whole picture in communicating with another person. Being able to do this is important in dealing with people.
DIFFICULT PEOPLE TEST YOUR OWN COMMUNICATION SKILLS
Why is this? Because in dealing with difficult people at work or home they really ‘push your buttons’. They get your emotions going. The more emotional you are the less able you are to pay attention, particularly to the non-verbal communication of another person. With a very difficult person if you are able to focus on reading their non-verbal communication and listening to their tone of voice not just their words, then you are in greater control.
CONTROL AND DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE
What this means is now you are actually more in control of your emotions, not the difficult person. Because your focus has gone beyond the angry and insulting words that person is saying to other aspects of their non-verbal communication, your focus is on the communication not just the person. You are focusing on the ‘real meaning’ in their communication beyond just their words.
DEVELOPING YOUR COMMUNICATION SKILLS FOR THE FUTURE
So at every opportunity in dealing with people, but particularly with difficult people aim to sharpen your communication skills. Go beyond the words to listen to their tone of voice and watch the non-verbal communication they are displaying. You will gain insights into what they really mean and you will gain control over your own emotions in dealing with people.
DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE ADVANCED IDEAS