Friday, November 17, 2017

Dealing with Difficult People? No I’ve Never Met Anyone Who Is Difficult!

In our Dealing with Difficult People Conference Presentations I always ask the attendees to raise their hand if they have ever met, dealt with or escaped from a difficult person in their life.  Without hesitation all hands shoot up into the air.  After all, haven’t we all come across someone who we have found difficult at some time?  Except one day, one hand stayed down.

DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE PRESENTATIONS

I’m not often surprised when speaking about how to deal with difficult people, but now I was intrigued.  Here was someone who had never met a difficult person.  So I had to stop and ask the lady in the front row.  “You’ve really never met a difficult person? I asked. No she said and shook her head.  There was silence from the rest of the audience in the conference hall. You have never found the behaviour of someone else to be difficult?  I asked again. No never.  I’ve never met a difficult person, she said firmly.

THE HIDDEN TRUTH RELATING TO PEOPLE

So what do you do when you find someone to be a difficult person and demanding, irritating, objectionable or trying? So what do you do when you disagree with someone? I queried. I never disagree with anyone, she said, I just always walk away and I never argue, I never have conflict and so I have never met a difficult person and I like everyone.  And there – hidden in the response was the answer to my questions.

When we avoid ever expressing a difference of opinion with others, we may avoid difficult situations but we also devalue the importance of our own thoughts, ideas and opinions being heard.

ACCEPTANCE IN DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE IS IMPORTANT

So its time to accept that when we express ourselves and respectfully disagree with someone they may not like what they hear and they may not like you.  For as Peter McWilliams explains: acceptance is such an important commodity, some have called it the first law of personal growth.

You may not get on with everyone you meet and they may not like you and that is alright.  You may disagree with others and they with you –that’s alright too.  You may find that there are people who you meet in your life whose behaviour you will find annoying, frustrating and difficult to deal with – and that is alright as well.

FOCUS ON YOUR STRATEGIES MORE

Just accept that this happens – you cannot like or be liked by everyone.  Your behaviour can be difficult and other people’s behaviour can be difficult.  Don’t blame, don’t shame!  Accept these differences and most of all, make it your aim to focus on strategies for yourself on how to deal with those behaviours in others you find the most difficult.

And now I’d like to invite you to get so many more ideas in our Free Guide on Dealing with Difficult People by signing up right now.

© Dr Judy Esmond. This article may be shared with others on the understanding that it remains intact and credit is given to the author and the website link http://www.dealingwithdifficultpeople.com

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